Hax: Relatives' no-shows are getting old

  • Article by: CAROLYN HAX
  • Updated: July 7, 2013 - 1:00 PM

Dear Carolyn: My brother and sister-in-law have been critical of the fact that we are planners. If we invite them for a dinner party, then we generally send out an invitation, date, time, occasion and ask for an RSVP. We never hear back. We’ve called and left messages on the phone, texted, e-mailed, but they don’t let us know if they are coming. My husband is gracious enough to say, “Just make enough. If they don’t come, we’ll have leftovers.” They are a family of four.

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tcatheartJul. 10, 13 8:05 AM

I would totally agree with the advice for the first situation. If it's a family party, say for fathers day, then you should make some phone calls and pick a day that everyone can make it. If it's a party for the sake of having people get together, pick a date and who ever can come, comes. Couldn't agree more with Carolyn's advice in this instance.

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bmom0505Jul. 10, 13 2:41 PM

On the first situation- I agree that if it is a family gathering she should make a call to see if everyone can make it. BUT there is no excuse for not responding to an invitation, however it is made. I was once told that once an invitation is extended and an RSVP requested, it is unreasonable to expect the host to re-extend the same invitation to those who have not responded. Presumably the host is busy with party preparations.

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