Hax: She cashes checks from abusive dad

  • Article by: CAROLYN HAX
  • Updated: March 19, 2013 - 5:19 PM

Dear Carolyn: My father was a nightmare. When I was a kid, he would tell me I was “a [expletive] just like your mother” and throw things at me; he even threw me down the stairs once and broke my arm. By the time I was 13, I realized I hated him and wanted him gone. Eventually I convinced my mother to leave him. I was 15 then and it’s been about 10 years since I’ve seen or spoken to him.

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davethedogMar. 20, 13 7:34 PM

You could also look at it this way: by spending the money on yourself, you are in a way assuaging your dad's guilt. And isn't that also a "Godly" thing to do? To forgive and therefore help someone who you now know to be mentally ill? Your dad possibly has moments of lucidity where guilt overwhelms him for the way he treated you, as it should. The kindest possible thing would be to use the money to treat YOURSELF with kindness--because it would be helping your sick father, but mostly because you deserve it.

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