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When people are dying (or feel as though they are) they start thinking about all those things in life they didnt do. Maybe being a grand mother was a big deal to her. Maybe stating the same thing to her you did to Carolyn would help. "No, I do not want children, I am unable to have children anyway.."etc. There is no need to dismiss the depression of a loved one in a situation like this?
Accepting serious illness or impending death with grace is very difficult for people. Getting cancer does not make people into instant saints. In fact for many it does the exact opposite. Just keep letting her know you feel sorry for her as well. And remember it's not really your fault she doesn't have a big family. If she wanted one so badly she could have had more children herself.
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