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Hmmmm. She thinks her ex is " selfish and inconsiderate of her feelings". I agree. Not that SHE was selfish or inconsiderate of her lover's WIFE's feelings while she was sleeping with the husband for 15 years. Karma rules!
Tell him that if he moves forward with this plan, that the wife needs to know the extent of your relationship with him - if not, then perhaps a gentle prodding that if he doesn't you will would suffice.
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