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I would definately say someone should know before you make it to the point of "lover" Its not right, its their health too. Its sad and sucks how it happened for you but there is no reason no matter how mild you think it is to put others at risk. And yes hes being immature about it, get ahold of his phone and delete the pic!
When to disclose is really hard to decide. I have go through hundreds of STD dating tips at a site I found at http://www.herpesdatingsitefree.com and the members have all kinds of opinions such as at the very beginning of met; or get well know of each other; or right before having sex. In my opinion, when to tell is not as important as someone think. Once you know you have to disclose sooner or later, it is just remains a time problem. It can not decide if the other will accept or refuse....
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