Student-athletes to parents: 'Grow up'

  • Article by: JASON GONZALEZ , Star Tribune
  • Updated: July 5, 2012 - 10:07 PM

When moms and dads intercede in teams' coaching, it creates more problems than it solves, kids and experts say.

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elli445Jul. 5, 1210:19 PM

It is too bad that so many parents live vicariously through their children. It only ruins the child's experience, and drives good coaches away. I saw it too much through my years of sports, and it is only getting worse.

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kindaliberalJul. 5, 1210:21 PM

There is nothing more sad or pathetic than a parent who has never grown up and ruins their child's athletic experience. I know a star athlete who signed with a west coast team to get as far away from his father as he could.

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mrhandsJul. 5, 1210:27 PM

Parents need to realize their kid is not going to play pro ball, is not going to get that full Division 1 scholarship, is not going to win the US open. If you have that kind of talent, you will be found at an early age. No one is going to care that your kid won some stupid trophy in high school. If you don't have the talent, and most of us don't, learn to play the game, have fun, and reap the benefits of knowing how to stay physically fit.

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boss09Jul. 5, 1210:27 PM

It's my experience that typically these parents had little or no success themselves, and now they want to live through their children. There is nothing wrong with cheering and being happy for your child. However too many make it their whole life.

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truthtimeJul. 5, 1210:43 PM

I covered high school athletics for a small newspaper years ago and the worst example of a loud, obnoxious parent was the husband of a coworker. They had a daughter who a good scorer and his guy would sit near the top of the stands and in a big, booming voice belittle the refs and other team. What a jerk. Then, in my last week there, his wife, my coworker, ragged on me because I didn't run the list of state scoring leaders for that week that included their daughter. There were a lot more important stories that week than a list. She and the co-publisher, a woman, implied I didn't cover girls sports as well. I told them to go talk to the school AD, who doubled as head coach of track, softball and one other sport (all girls). He and I were good friends and he never had a problem with the balance I had between boys and girls. Those two ruined my last days at the office, all over their rabid attitude for high school athletics. As for myself, I never played high school athletics, but play co-rec and rec sports (touch football, volleyball, softball, etc.) through college and into my 50s. I still can run and don't have busted hips and knees from high school sports, while friends my age who played high school football had hip replacements in their 30s, can barely walk and look like crippled 80-year-olds and they are only 55. I think high school athletics are way overrated and divert too much attention and resources away from academics. Take sports out of the schools and make them club sports like Europe.

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goonzieJul. 5, 1210:46 PM

while we are on the topic of overbearing helicoptor parents in varsity sports could we see an article on the ridiclous expectations for athletes (and their families) to attend every camp camp, play in "off-season" tournament lest they be left behind for their "lack of commitment? I love athletics of all kinds and teach physical education but the expectations are out of control- especially in the "off-season." Just had some relatives go to Vegas, in July, for an "off-season" HOCKEY tournament....

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pokey2008Jul. 5, 1211:26 PM

isn't it a shame. Over and over. We just do not learn. Parents want and want and want. But we do not learn. Or listen.

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kinnickJul. 5, 1211:43 PM

My Dad was a wonderful man,he once told me he was my Dad not my buddy. Wonderful advice for all you Dad's that want your children to be your 'buddies'! Good grief let the child be one!

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ztwoodsJul. 5, 1211:56 PM

Parents are the reason I stopped coaching and officiating. I used to love teaching kids various sports, but when I had a mother come down out of the stands during a hockey game and tell me "you tell my son if he doesn't start working harder he will have to play defense", and parents would be yelling at the each other in the stands fairly often, I knew that would be my last season. Parents need to let the kids play and shut their mouths!

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daveseavyJul. 6, 1212:04 AM

I've heard parents using language they'd wash their kids' mouths out with soap for using. Not only is that leading by a very poor example, it says far more about the parent than it ever will about the coach, refs, team mates, etc. Parents need to realize the sport is for the students - not the parents. In some cities, parents have been banned from school sports because of their behavior.

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